Paradoxes

Some moments are magical in the way they allow opposites to co-exist. This is one such moment.Right now- I am very emotional, yet calm and peaceful.

In this moment, now, there is a lot of happiness and a deep pain. There is fun and masti, and also disappointment. There is gratefulness, especially to God, and there is an anger, a complaint. There is nostalgia, a lot of it, but also a little hope. There is this terrible sorrow one feels on losing something really precious, yet there is a sense of extreme joy at the realisation of that something precious having been there all this while, having been mine, and that it will never be truly lost. There is a deep sense of attachment and a strong growing urge of detachment. There is loneliness, a dark, desperate feeling of being lost and useless, and there is a bright smiling light on the other hand, something that reassures me with a loving presence that I'm not all alone, not all unwanted.

Recently, Bawa gave a superb talk at the -to be youth ashram in Vashind.I found my answers to several questions which were running in my mind for the last few weeks and which were driving me insane. He spoke about lots of things but the "sperm story" was my take away from this fantabulous session. He said that how can you ever think that you are a loser? Your very existence proves that you have perhaps won one of the toughtest battle on this planet.Think of it this way- There are more than 300 million sperm cells but only one lucky sperm finds its way to the egg. And you are that lucky one!There were 300 million more fighting for that position but YOU --YES YOU made it!! Now this is more competitive than CAT/GMAT/ any other RAT RACE you can possibly think of! *give a pat on your back* I was thinking that how can someone find so much optimism in anything and everything? I mean cmon!- a SPERM!! Instantly dimag ki batti jali --

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but seeing with new eyes.

In the end, life is not a war that you have to win. Its not always about looking for challenges and overcoming them. Life is DEFINITELY not about how well you have planned it. But its more like an "unplanned journey" and how you explore those magical moments in all the chaos! Life is just this moment, this one-fist-joy, one-fist-sorrow, this flickering hope, this affectionate pain, this paradox. They say sometimes winning is the only thing. I would like to disagree...it never ever is everything. And thank God for that.

Quoting Buddha (from ashthavakra gita), “it’s a game of losing.”
I maybe a loser ( not really, atleast i have won tht war of 300.whoopieee! ) but I have what really matters and what I really need, at the end of it all. It feels great. I feel blessed to be on this spriritual path, have a Guru and be surrounded by such wonderful people.


Thanku Guruji :)
JAI GURU DEVA!